5 Stages of Culture Shock

I have read in some articles about online marketing that putting numbers in a title (the actual number, not spelling it out) is more likely to be read. So lets see if this experiment works.

After re-reading my previous post I see how someone may think I am seeing the world through rose colored glasses. Is that possible? most definitely. However, this is not my first rodeo. I have spent A LOT of time in Israel. I lived in Tsfat from 2001-2002, at the height of almost weekly suicide bombings. I worked for the mayor of Jerusalem in the summer of 2006, during the Lebanon war. I have spent innumerable holidays and vacations in Israel, and most recently I spent a month in Israel while considering my possible Aliyah. But, this does not make me immune to the culture shock that I am sure awaits me. I hope that the knowledge of the process will be able to help me better navigate through it.

Much like the stages of grieving that was championed by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, the stages of Culture Shock highlight the process in which a person adapts (or fails to adapt) to a new culture. I have seen these stages written in various forms, however what is listed below makes the most sense to me.

Regardless of the fact that I have spent a significant amount of time in Israel previously, I am certain that I will go through these phases in some fashion. I believe writing about it here will be a good way for me to cope, as well as help other people who may deal with the same thing in the future.

First Stage: The Honeymoon Stage

Some might refer to this phenomenon as the "Pink Cloud." In this phase of adaptation to a new culture a person basks in the glow of their new surroundings. All the eccentricities their new home are fun and new. However, this slowly fades and reality hits.

Second Stage: Distress (also referred to as "negotiation" which I assume is a reference to Kubler-Ross, though I don't really see how it applies here)

In this phase all those idiosyncrasies that you found exciting and new become the very things that frustrate you. Barriers with language, social norms and other differences in culture all become sources of distress. Lack of familial support may cause someone to isolate further from society.

Third Stage: Re-Integration

In this stage a person starts looking at their new culture as inferior compared to the one they left behind. You become hostile and prejudice to the culture and people around you. During this stage one might idealize the culture they left behind, pining to return. This might sound discouraging, however like the stages of grief, these are all healthy steps towards acceptance.

Fourth Stage: Autonomy (also called emergence)

This is the first stage of acceptance. After going through the process of resenting your new surroundings and culture, you begin to accept the peculiarities of your new culture and start to appreciate it. You feel confident that you can handle situations that may arise and come out of your isolation.

Fifth Stage: Independence (or mastery)
You finally begin to embrace your new culture. Unlike the honeymoon phase, you are now realistic of the positive and negative aspects of your new culture, and feel better equipped to handle them. Isolation and depression (hopefully) have disappeared, and you integrate into your new surroundings.


These stages may happen over varying lengths of time. I know that I will probably go through these stages, even though I've experienced Israeli culture and know what to expect.

For those of you that are not fully familiar with Israelis and Israeli culture, it is certainly different than that of Anglo culture.

You have to realize, all Israelis grew up and live in a reality where their very existence is at risk. This creates a unique dynamic. While almost all Israelis I have come into contact are generally very sweet and kind people, the societal norms may come across as extremely rude. For example, waiting in line is not something Israelis are familiar with. You may be taken aback when waiting for a bus when everyone pushes his or her way to the front. I am somewhat used to this now, but it is definitely a little jarring at first. All Israelis are conscripted into the military (or do civil service). Seeing people in plain clothes with a machine gun slung around their back is a fairly normal occurrence. If you have never seen it before, I am sure it could be a little scary.

The existential threat to the State of Israel is a reality. However, I know from experience that no matter how crazy things might seem on CNN while you are in America, when you are in Israel it is business as usual. When I was in Jerusalem in the summer of 2006 there was a war going on in the north of the country. Israel is smaller than New Jersey, so when I say "The North" it is not some far away place. The streets of Jerusalem were the same way they are on any regular day. That is the resilience of the Israeli people and their culture. Last night I stayed awake reading about the political situation (something I do a bit too often), and I thought to myself "what the hell am I getting myself into??" but I know from past experience that life will go on as smooth as always.

Mark Twain once said "If I had more time I would have made this shorter," but alas I have to finish packing. I need to be at the airport in 3 hours. Writing this blog entry has been a good way for me to emotionally detach from the fact that I am moving out of the country. This will be my 5th relocation in as many years (Boston, New York, South Florida, Denver... Israel). However, I do not think this move will be short lived, I have made a firm decision and Israel is where I am laying roots. The first line of the Grateful Dead song "Uncle Johns Band" goes "The first days are the hardest days...Don't you worry anymore" Something that everyone that is making the move to Israel (or anywhere else for that matter) should keep in mind.